You just made a big career milestone (well, two years ago) and don’t know where you should go next. But your boss has ideas and you’re not sure you like them…

You’re so stuck you wouldn’t know a next step if it smacked you on the bottom, and are beginning to suspect that the problem might be (*whispers*) YOU…

You’re kinda kicking your heels CPD-wise so figure you might as well book that ‘Advanced Excel’ course, even though the thought of it makes you want to stick biros under your fingernails…

God we’re obsessed with perfection, aren’t we? I don’t know who to blame. Mark Zuckerberg? Kim Kardashian? Everyone on Instagram? Doesn’t matter. Here we are in the age of airbrushing and trolling,  where those we look up to are celebrated one week and torn down the next, and where competition means that there’s always someone new ready to sit their bum at your favourite hot desk. Is it any wonder we don’t want to put a foot wrong? 

I’m here today to argue for a bit of mess, a bit of making it up, a bit of trying and failing and trying again. WorkJoy is rarely achieved by those who took the well trodden path. Rather, it’s those who zig and zag a bit who eventually find themselves where they were meant to be all along, and they’ve usually got a great anecdote or two to tell you over drinks as well. So whether you’re paused, paralysed or playing it safe, relax and join this ride. 

How to use this guide

As WorkJoy guides go, this one is fairly…compact, and very possible to read in one sitting. But as ever, feel free to scroll to what you need to hear, bounce around a bit, and return to reread what resonates.  

Contents

What’s better than standing still? 
Know this: what’s really getting in your way
The power of ‘yet’
WorkJoy community story: using the power of ‘yet’
Five steps to busting a limiting belief
Stop filling in holes. Build mountains.
Next steps: what one thing can you do today? 

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What’s better than standing still? 

Let me start by saying that standing still is okay…sometimes. It might be that you’ve huffed and puffed and finally gotten up that hill, through a glass ceiling, finished a whacking great project or come out the other side of a significant life event, and you need to regroup. More to the point, you need some time to appreciate what you’ve achieved and celebrate yourself for making it. Hurrah for you! 🎉Enjoy every second. Slamming your foot back on the gas at this point would be unnecessary, and probably pretty knackering. 

But. But. But. If you’ve done your achieving and your celebrating, you’ve had your R&R, or you’ve been stuck in second gear for a long time, it could be time to get moving. And that can be where the paralysis kicks in. Because not everyone has their next steps mapped out. Chances are, your next move could be in several directions – some of which you’ve considered, some you perhaps can’t even see yet. When you could do anything, it’s all too easy to do nothing. To wait until an option lands in your lap or someone (most likely your boss) comes up with one for you. 

This brings me back to my opening question: what’s better than standing still? 

The answer? Taking just one step forward. In any direction.  

Literally, just pick one. Try something. Anything. It doesn’t have to be the perfect move, it just has to be a move, and if it turns out not to be the right move, that’s great information (because knowing what you don’t want can be almost as helpful as knowing what you do). Imperfect moves are still progress. Make enough of them, and you’ll make the right one eventually. 

But Beth, I hear you say, what if I’m really stuck? Like, can’t-see-the-wood-for-the-trees stuck? It’s likely that the issue isn’t your options, but what’s happening in your head…

If you’re in need of a little inspo to get you started on this topic, I found bucket loads of it in my conversation with Stephen Dowd. I won’t steel his thunder here, I’ll let him tell you his incredible story. It’s one that’s stuck with me ever since we met.

Know this: what’s really getting in your way

So often, it is your own limiting beliefs and not a practical issue or situation that really make you feel stuck. Much of your thinking is driven by your experiences, your fears, and the unhelpful stories that tell you everyone else is awesome and you’re just faking it. To get a grip on some of your limiting beliefs, try completing these sentences:

When you’re at your best, feeling brilliant, supported, and demonstrating your capability, the stories you tell yourself are...

e.g., I am strong, I am capable, I’m great at…, I can do anything I put my mind to…

When you’re at your middle ground, feeling fine, pootling along, and doing okay, the stories you tell yourself are…

e.g., I’m pretty good at…, I know I can cope, I’ve been through challenges before…

When you’re at your worst, feeling insecure, unsure, unsupported, and lacking confidence, the stories you tell yourself are…

e.g., everyone else is better than me, I am not good enough, people will laugh at me…

FREE DOWNLOAD Use my Limiting Beliefs Exercise template to pinpoint what that record in your head is really stuck on. Get it here.

It’s likely you’ll notice some limiting beliefs. Some of these may come from the ‘when I’m at my worst’ category but watch out for the ‘when I’m at my best’ category, too. Both ends of the spectrum can have us out of kilter with reality!

The power of ‘yet’

Dr Carol Dweck suggests that a solution to being stuck in a fixed mindset, with limiting beliefs, is to add the word ‘yet’ to a sentence. The ‘yet’ allows you to open your thinking to future possibilities even if it seems impossible now. The ‘yet’ has the power to move you towards action. Try this five-step approach to help you move from a limiting belief to a more joyful place. 

WorkJoy community story: using the power of ‘yet’

“I’m a nurse specialist in the NHS. During the pandemic everything changed for me, I was redeployed to a more clinical area, and it all felt very chaotic. When things normalised, I felt like I didn’t know who I was at work anymore. I’d lost my way. I had the opportunity to move from a Band 6 to a Band 7 role but didn’t know how to establish myself as the senior person in the team. My goal was to get back in the zone of my work identity. “The WorkJoy focus on growth mindset was really powerful for me. I saw how many excuses I was making for myself and worked through them. The job I came from had a difficult team dynamic and I felt I carried that with me into this role. So, I wrote a letter to my old managers then shredded it. I always forget about that because I’ve let it go. It’s completely gone! “The best thing I learned was the word ‘Yet’. This little word really empowered me to ask questions of senior staff members and consultants. It’s not that I don’t want to know something, it’s that I haven’t had the chance to learn it yet.  “It’s become a key principle in my management style. Above our desk at work I wrote, ‘Team, we don’t know about this YET.’ Now, we learn something new each week because we write it on the board. Something about the word just chills me out. “As time has passed, I’ve settled into the job. The WorkJoy strategies have made a massive difference to me, at work and at home because that’s a job as well.”

Five steps to busting a limiting belief

Steps	Example
Step 1: Limiting belief	I’m too busy to fit learning into my life
Step 2: The power of yet	I haven’t found ways to fit learning into my life yet
Step 3: Move towards action	I am experimenting with how I fit learning into my life
Step 4: Recognising learning	I have found ways to fit learning into my life
Step 5: Integrated habit	Learning is part of my life

Reflection questions:  What limiting beliefs would you like to bust? How could you use ‘yet’ to help you move to a more purposeful place?

Stop filling in holes. Build mountains. 

When you’re stumped for where to go next, it can be very (very) tempting to pour some time and energy (and even cash – yours or your organisation’s) into getting better at things you’re not great at. Filling in your skill holes, so to speak. 

It’s unlikely that you’re going to be 100% fantastic at 100% of your job. More likely, you’re going to be 100% fantastic at most of it, and struggle with one or two things. Don’t sweat it: we can’t all be great at everything. If these things you’re not so great at are genuinely limiting your career or progress, get on them right away. But if not? ‘Good enough’ might just be good enough. 

Before you commit to that course and hand over those CPD hours and pennies, always ask yourself: how good do I really have to be at this thing? 

If the answer is honestly, that you’re already good enough at it to get by, can I suggest switching focus to something you’re actually great at, and becoming even greater? Becoming – dare I say it – the best? 

• Can you become the best at the one thing you want to be known for?
• Can you become the best at the one thing your organisation values the most?
• Can you become the best at the one thing that’ll make you the most cash? (sounds cynical but especially valid for entrepreneurs in the current economic climate)
• Can you become the best at the one thing that will bring you the most WorkJoy?

Fill in a load of holes and what do you have? Flat ground. No one’s going to trip up, but no one’s going to be dazzled either, and you might find your WorkJoy suffers along the way. Build a mountain of brilliance and people will flock to you. You’ll provide real value, and – one hopes – receive value in return. 

Also, don’t be afraid to build a few mini mountains. So you’re good at presenting – get great! You’re known as an excellent people manager – get brilliant! You’re everyone’s go-to writer, problem-solver or tech whiz – build those skills into mini mountains and rule the world! 

Reflection questions:  What skill holes have you been trying to fill, that don’t really need to be filled? Which skills could you build a mountain from instead? What result might this have for your WorkJoy, organisation or finances?

Next steps: what one thing can you commit to? 

In the name of progress over perfection, let’s commit to doing one thing to getting unstuck or moving forward (remember: in any direction). It could be booking a chat with someone in your squad, researching a course, role or organisation, or even doing a guided meditation. Or you could commit to one of these things: 

Reading a chapter a week
If that book happened to be my book, WorkJoy: a toolkit for a better working life, you’d have absorbed an entire WorkJoy curriculum in three months.  

Listening to a podcast on your commute
My WorkJoy Jam podcast archive is full of guests chatting about goals, motivation, limiting beliefs, habits and more. Think of it like absorbing WorkJoy by osmosis. 

Listening to a five-minute audio every day
My 21-day GloomBusters audio guide pops into your WhatsApp every day for three weeks. There’s no better route out of WorkGloom. 

Booking a 1-1 coaching call with me
Simply the best way to get unstuck, pronto. You can schedule it right now. 

You can also follow me on Linkedin and Instagram for an (almost) daily dose of WorkJoy.  

Spread the WorkJoy

Know someone who’s struggling to get unstuck right now? Pop this guide into their inbox…and maybe buy them a coffee to go with ☕.